internetfeet: People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here” And menstruation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone”
Mi papá tiene 47 años= my dad is 47 years old Mi papa tiene 47 anos= my potato has 47 assholes I love spanish
coochiejuice: The 1500s were truly ridiculous?? you could catch a disease from breathing too hard and doctors would just cut a nigga open and say “bleed it out, my grace, you’ll be straight”
alex-bringmethe-sexicans: oldrockstars: if classical instruments being used in rock music isn’t the tightest shit ever then tell me what is My vagina.
meanplastic: Grandmas watchin Kim Kardashian’s sextape
adornoble: hatewizard: vondell-swain: (a video of jehovah witnesses telling deaf people to stop masturbating, with 50 cent’s “in da club” dubbed over it) i am going to die this is huge
babyhinata: “looks like the devil won this round folks”
zarry: i feel this on a spiritual level
stupid-fucking-rope: shagmestyles: There’s a drunk guy outside singing What Makes You Beautiful to a tree. So I opened my window and played the actual song and he just got so happy. He looked at the sky and yelled, “You’re beautiful too, Jesus.”
kabutopz: if you don’t give your boyfriend blowjobs what are you even good for
windows98: ssxvxtricky: videohall: Peter Griffin camel laugh GOD tHSI ALWAYS GETS ME
googlevideos: googlevideos: there’s nothing worse than a hot asshole wait fuck i meant like someone who’s hot but is a dickhead not like a warm butthole
safecampx: sqvad: history1970s: ...
(via inacognito, blanklove)
teacher: why are you late?
me: why are you so obsessed with me
and here we see a visual representation of my life...